Monday, July 7, 2008

let it flow (excerpts from journal)

fights and yelling and dead ants and empty bank accounts and my ass through a coffee table and feeling so lost, so incredibly lost and not being able to keep my head above the water but knowing that in time, a short time, everything will be fine and all of this will just be past and maybe just something that happened that one summer in chicago but maybe it will help me grow and learn and know how to deal with shit when it creeps up like that rotten stench that grows from the garbage bins outside of our door.
yeah keep walking buddy don't look at my girlfriend like that or you will get what you deserve just keep strutting and go home to your wife and kids and stare at them.
get out of my face woman, i love you but i love me more so shut up, i ain't afraid of death but i am afraid of my momma, he can't hit me anymore because he is in jail now for that drug charge are things that we hear and this is chicago and these are the lives of the people all around us and for them its about fighting but for me its about biting my tongue.
ive never felt so far from god as i do now but i think that that is god telling me i need be closer.
hey landlady youre a real piece of work you know that? i bet you do landlady.
why do people think that going to church is salvation when the minute they step out of church they start acting like they are drunks staggering out of the club swapping numbers and smacking asses?
what is it with these people and fireworks, it sounds and looks like a beautiful baghdad
out there tonight but just shut up already.
your love is unlike anything i have experienced before. just keep it coming, and ill catch up with you.





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